The Museum First Date

Despite initial misgivings, I am now a full believer in the Museum First Date. When first proposed to me, I put it in the same category as the Movie First Date: external focus plus no chance for talking equals first date awkwardness and little more. But I had to admit I was rather tired of the Coffee First Date with its expectations of dazzling, flowing conversation among an audience of laptop-clad students always much more interested in the first date going down at the next table than their own homework.

Thus I agreed to a museum, and I am now a convert. It provided ample opportunities for talking as well as a parade of new information to discuss. And, if your date is boring, you have something much more interesting to look at than the bottom of your coffee cup!

Not that my date was boring. Well, not entirely boring. I feel terrible about saying that, but unfortunately I had to carry the bulk of the conversation. This was unexpected as we had a great email conversation going, filled with sarcasm, wit and pith. Still reeling from my date with ADD boy, I was strictly keeping my hopes in the “Eh, why not find out?” range, and I added a new requirement: an online chat pre-date. I wanted to ensure that this new boy (who, due to his passion for sailing, I have nicknamed Boat Boy), could hold a functional conversation before I gave up a Saturday afternoon.

So one morning we chatted online and HUZZAH! More sarcasm, wit and pith. Lovely! Afterward, since I had the entire conversation in front of me, I went back and counted how many questions I had asked him. Nine. Then I went back and counted how many questions he had asked of me. Holy hell, NINE! An even-sided conversation? Still sore from being so often verbally stepped on during my last date, this was an antidote. And yes, this is also evidence of a girl over-analyzing a conversation. Take that as you will.

Going into my first date with Boat Boy I had no reservations about our ability to maintain an enjoyable conversation. What I was worried about was that I wasn’t going to find him attractive. In an effort to save face in light of that last statement, I would like to point out that I went on a date with him anyway, and that I fully believe that the myriad factors of attraction can leave you unbelievably attracted to someone who you would have passed on the street without a glance before. But…and you knew there was a but coming…his profile pictures were terrible. A bunch of boat pictures with him squinting into the sun, and one picture that was so truly awful he looked like a buffoon straight out of Alice in Wonderland. Once again, I feel awful for saying that, but please see above.

And then the reverse happened. He was rather quiet, slow to ask questions, and a bit, well…boring. But upon meeting him I saw something that was not shown in his pictures: he has GREEN EYES. They were incredible. I felt like a snake’s victim. I just stared. And then found myself looking at his lovely jaw line and his great smile, and was happy to find myself thinking, “He doesn’t look like a buffoon at all!” In fact, I had to fight the urge to haul him into the museum’s back staircase and make out with him.

The date lasted three hours, both in the museum and a walk afterward. While he was not nearly as pithy or sarcastic as in his emails, he was noticeably nervous. It is entirely plausible that in his attempt to make a good impression he dialed back considerably into that non-offensive-but-seriously-less-personality plane that politicians so often reside within. In this light I decided to give Boring Boat Boy the benefit of the boubt…er…doubt, and agreed to a second date. Do you think if next time I go with pushing him into a stairwell and making out with him I’m more likely to see his sarcastic, pithy side?

I say it’s worth a shot.