The single girl at the party

I take it as a sign that I am used to being the single girl when I don’t realize until I show up at my friend’s party, “Hey! I don’t know ANYONE here except the host, and once again, I am attending a party alone. Fan-TASTIC.”

But my gracious lovely friend was gracious and lovely and quickly put a drink in my hand and sat me down with three other, at least what I first surmised, gracious lovely people.

Of these three gracious lovely people, two were an adorable couple and the third was a cute boy in a hideous Hawaiian shirt. Apparently, mid-planning, the party gained a tropical theme, but only a few poor souls got the message.

But I soon forgot about the hideous Hawaiian shirt as I was dazzled by his tremendous flirting ability. Flirting ability and mention of ex-girlfriend. Nice.

Knowing that finding a single man in Madison who is capable of maintaining a conversation is akin to a rare bird sighting, I turned up the charm. I did the Lingering Look, the Lean In, AND the Hand Brush. He was there, seeing my bet and raising each time, while we maintained a lovely meandering conversation. He even followed me to the loveseat once it was vacated.

Was this really happening?! After a string of terrible dates, an intelligent, gregarious, cute, SINGLE man seemed too good to be true! Yup, you guessed it. It was.

After Hawaiian shirt boy left I did the natural thing of asking the host if I could date her friend. Not so much. He will be moving to the West Coast soon where his “very serious girlfriend” lives. Party. Foul. But in his defense, he only had about 400 places in our conversation where he could have mentioned that.

So, new rule: men who hide the fact that they are unavailable so they can flirt and bask in the attention of the single girl at the party shall be forced to identify themselves to the general public by wearing grass skirts to match their hideous Hawaiian shirts.